No, it's not all up to chance. People are far more in control of their lives than you can imagine. I've lost count of how many people I've met who came from tiny country towns and flourished in the city better than I have - taking charge of their lives is more powerful than what the world will throw at you. Also, your perfect somebody is never found. They are forged by you, and you by them.
This is a completely random world and it is all up to chance. Whether your perfect somebody exists is a number's game. But if you are willing to have normal standards you may yet find happiness, at least in a mediocre way. I mean -- companionship.
Why do you say such bizarre things? That you first say that love and companionship isn't necessary but then say that loneliness is a battle that can't be won?? It would probably be better to say that loneliness is a path that never ends, but that's about as useful as saying that humans are bipeds.
You do not need love and companionship to be a whole person. But it certainly does help one's self-image, and improves quality of life (most times, but not always!). That being said, I know from personal experience that loneliness is perhaps the most difficult battleground. And you never can win.