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Interracial Dating....


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#61 anli

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Posted 19 December 2005 - 08:53 PM

I know seven kids who are what the Chinese in our area refer to as half-half: half Chinese, half white. There seems to be a higher than normal divorce rate among the parents of these half-half kids (because of culture differences), especially if one parent is a first-generation immigrant. Sure, the kids might be in general prettier and/or smarter than the average person of homologous ethnic background, but a broken family doesn't really seem worth it (you probably shouldn't be marrying for the sole purpose of producing beautiful, intelligent children anyway...that's too much like human breeding.)
Ideally, race doesn't matter, but in reality, life isn't that pretty. Social expectations can tear a relationship apart - when I was dating my last boyfriend, several of the aunties at our Chinese church found out and started making snide remarks to my mom (who is much less conservative than most first-generation Asian immigrant parents) and me, ranging from the relatively naiive "Ai-ya! Is white boy smart enough for Chinese girl?" to downright ignorant and hurtful "Why do you let her date white boy? You know American boys not safe. Tch-tch. You think your daughter so smart, so pretty, white boy wanna date her? In five year, ten year, if you don't watch out, nobody wanna date her." (The implication in that last comment is that a white boy is more likely to sexually harass or rape me than an Chinese boy.)
I think interracial relationships can work out, but only if both parties are determined to make it so. Then again, the same can be said for any other relationship.

Edited by anli, 22 December 2005 - 09:47 AM.


#62 xx_lost_love_xx

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Posted 21 December 2005 - 05:04 PM

my parents are strict on it or was strict on it because they were talking about how chinese were to marry chinese. but they eventually realized that race doesnt matter. its about the person, and their traits abd persaonality.

i have dated an asian before and an african american and im chinese. i dont mind i mean, its not the race that determines everything its the personality. my current crush is half mexican/polish.

i guess it depends on how you been raised and your environment. because i was raised in an almost all asian school. thats why i was never attracted to other races and when i saw interracial dating i found it weird, because all i ever saw were the same races dating. but than when high school started i was surrounding by a lot of other races and more interracial dating.


#63 Jakalope'sBoy

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Posted 20 February 2006 - 07:39 AM

When me and my sisters see Black woman with white man, we whisper to each other talking about her and downing her and wish we could erase her from the Black race. My sister call Black women like that "dangerous". But its not in joke and play, we really mean it. Erasing her from the Black race is only a exagerration though.


And you dare call a black woman who loves a white man dangerous? Contradict much?

Have you seen what you written?

Maybe I should italicize what you wrote.

But its like when I see a minority race with a white person, I guess you can say I'm not 100% for it. I'm not racist against white people either. Some of my friends are white.


And you actually want to claim that you're not racist?

So by your failed logic it's okay to be friends with white people but if there is any sort of physical or emotional attraction with black people they deserve to be disowned, or "drowned" (or "downed" whatever you were spewing)?


People like you disgust me. You actually dare to judge white people solely on their skin colour. You don't even know their feelings, mindset, lifestyle and whatever they've been or go through. How are these white people supposed to keep their head up high with immature, unfounded and inane comments such as yours? Your comments and thoughts are narrow-minded, reprehensible and repugnant.

You should be ashamed of yourself. You are ignorant.

If you think what I wrote what is in any way harsh re-read what YOU wrote about drowning and erasing a black woman from the black race simply because she is attracted to a white man.

Opinions usually have a right if they have merit. Your opinion was garbage, hate-induced, frightening, appaling and perpetuates hatred.

There is no sense in being diplomatic because a view like that needs a direct reality check.

We are all racist to some degree but with comments like yours based on no intelligence and outward and unreasonable hate makes you a racist that should be paid attention to.

You're a racist.

Edited by Jakalope'sBoy, 20 February 2006 - 07:46 AM.


#64 Guest_Umbra Res_*

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Posted 20 February 2006 - 10:45 AM

And you dare call a black woman who loves a white man dangerous? Contradict much?

Have you seen what you written?

Maybe I should italicize what you wrote.
And you actually want to claim that you're not racist?

So by your failed logic it's okay to be friends with white people but if there is any sort of physical or emotional attraction with black people they deserve to be disowned, or "drowned" (or "downed" whatever you were spewing)?
People like you disgust me. You actually dare to judge white people solely on their skin colour. You don't even know their feelings, mindset, lifestyle and whatever they've been or go through. How are these white people supposed to keep their head up high with immature, unfounded and inane comments such as yours? Your comments and thoughts are narrow-minded, reprehensible and repugnant.

You should be ashamed of yourself. You are ignorant.

If you think what I wrote what is in any way harsh re-read what YOU wrote about drowning and erasing a black woman from the black race simply because she is attracted to a white man.

Opinions usually have a right if they have merit. Your opinion was garbage, hate-induced, frightening, appaling and perpetuates hatred.

There is no sense in being diplomatic because a view like that needs a direct reality check.

We are all racist to some degree but with comments like yours based on no intelligence and outward and unreasonable hate makes you a racist that should be paid attention to.

You're a racist.

Its called racial gossip XD. Do you mind if I add a little to your statements then? Because I agree with you, but want to put out an interesting thought.

People’s notions of race come from misunderstanding physical criteria, like skin color, hair type, facial structure, body build, etc. Stuff that’s based on biological instead of social.

Black people from the south are in a different subculture than white people from the same place, but people see them different because of the way they look biologically. I know the genetic difference between the two are small, 85% is human genetic variation and 15% of differences is race.

Racism is triggered a lot by when a person of a certain race, doesn’t go along with the mainstream role that everyone expects them to act upon. Even when its your own race that’s against you for not following the stereotypical standards that are supposed to meet.What I’m saying is that people don’t see the culture, or our genetic make up as much as they see the physical appearances..thats why when people say "we're all the same race", I disagree."we're all the same race." What we define as race nowadays,has nothing to do with us being humans at all. :)

"Others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself"...isn't this quote true?

#65 Jakalope'sBoy

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Posted 20 February 2006 - 11:02 AM

Its called racial gossip XD. Do you mind if I add a little to your statements then? Because I agree with you, but want to put out an interesting thought.

People’s notions of race come from misunderstanding physical criteria, like skin color, hair type, facial structure, body build, etc. Stuff that’s based on biological instead of social.

Black people from the south are in a different subculture than white people from the same place, but people see them different because of the way they look biologically. I know the genetic difference between the two are small, 85% is human genetic variation and 15% of differences is race.

Racism is triggered a lot by when a person of a certain race, doesn’t go along with the mainstream role that everyone expects them to act upon. Even when its your own race that’s against you for not following the stereotypical standards that are supposed to meet.What I’m saying is that people don’t see the culture, or our genetic make up as much as they see the physical appearances..thats why when people say "we're all the same race", I disagree."we're all the same race." What we define as race nowadays,has nothing to do with us being humans at all. :)

"Others may hate you but those who hate you don't win unless you hate them. And then you destroy yourself"...isn't this quote true?


I completely agree with you, Umbra Res.

It is true that a particular race will disown you or look at you weird if we don't fit the wired stereotypes. This is unfortunate because if even some belong to the same race (black or white) there are different ethnicities and cultures that come from them. As ethinicities are we supposed to forget our culture values and conform to the term race??

As I said, we are all racist to a degree. It is our natural instincts to be afraid of what is different. HOWEVER, when one singles out a particular race and not others that is racist and spiteful. And when one wishes bad things upon another simply because of race (and knowing nothing about the person) that is ignorant and racist.

#66 grrrrrace

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Posted 24 February 2006 - 07:11 PM

i personally believe there is nothing wrong with interracial dating as long as culturally, you don't clash like crazy. it's unfortunate that some people aren't tolerant of it.

#67 se7enzgirl

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Posted 26 February 2006 - 06:29 PM

hmm..my parents are dead against me dating outside our own race..
theyve got the idea that the cultural differences n mindsets will be a real problem..which i guess is true to a certain extent.

Edited by se7enzgirl, 26 February 2006 - 06:29 PM.


#68 Ricadonna

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Posted 18 March 2006 - 10:10 AM

While I was in Mexico last week, we were on a tour of the Mayan ruins, and we were with another married couple. They were each in their 40s, married one year, and the woman was white from Oregon & the man was Indian, born & raised in India until he went to college.

It was a very odd couple to look at... I admit, at first I thought "they must just be friends or at the same hotel taking the same tour on the same day" then thought that it'd be funny if they were really a couple because they seemed mismatched. But they were actually married & were so sweet to each other. <3

And it's true that cultural differences got in the way.
The woman, Jeanie, told us that his parents were against them marrying because they have a stereotypical view of Americans in their minds (they all smoke, drink, do drugs, and own guns -- who wants someone like that? they wondered)... but once they learned how well they got along together, they liked her. :] Now they all get along, she's learned his language, and they visit India every other year for like, 3 months.

So, hate to be cliche, but love can conquer all. XD

#69 lilazndemongrl

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Posted 18 March 2006 - 12:35 PM

um...i already posted this in a different place but yeah...i'll say it again...i'm vietnamese and my boyfriend is half mexican, and part korean...and my mom hates him because he has mexican in him...it sucks...i've never dated within my race and my mom hates it...she's ok with caucasian guys and asians but she hates hispanics and african americans...i hate the way she assumes that they all love hip hop and sex...my boyfriend is into neither of those...he's obsessed with anime and drawing. he listens to asian pop. and the first thing that pops into his head after being told "you suck" is "Quit being so mean to me, Tracy." i hate her stupid assumptions...




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